Friday, 2 May 2014

Pain, pain, go away


It is really dreadful to watch someone you love having to put up with severe pain. Even more horrifying  to have experienced that particular pain myself before having my course of radiotherapy three years ago.
Unfortunately, Harry has this pain in several different areas of his spine, hip and shoulders due to advanced prostate cancer spread.
He is on painkillers that seem to mask it for a while.
His face goes white when the pain gets bad and he nearly cries.
He is normally a *toughy* and used to be on building sites all his working life, so he is used to roughing it. However, this pain is unbearable at times. He cannot walk very well and sometimes not at all. He has to get up in the night and have the lights on and be helped to the bathroom. By the time we get back to bed, he falls into a deep sleep and starts to snore loudly. I lie awake until the dawn. I am feeling really tired and totally uninspired when it comes to blogging, as well as all the emotional stuff.
Hoping everyone will understand.


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20 comments:

  1. Celia2 May 2014 at 16:54

    So sorry Maggie, you and Harry have a tough row to hoe. Can you sleep somewhere else after Harry falls back asleep? You need to rest too. I'm keeping you in my prayers.

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  2. Jinksy2 May 2014 at 18:03

    I understand only too well, although we were divorced way before my husband-as-was developed multiple myeloma. A plea for help during the night meant a quick get up, get dressed and trot five minutes through the dark streets to his apartment... Those were the days...or rather, nights.I do hope the medical profession can help alleviate the pain with better meds - and so, perhaps, help you to better sleeping patterns.Love 'n'hugs to you and yours. ♥

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  3. Dimple2 May 2014 at 18:37

    I'm sorry you are having such a hard time. I agree with Celia, you need to rest. I hope you can find some way to accomplish it.

    I pray you will have strength from God.

    Blessings~

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  4. Eddie Bluelights2 May 2014 at 19:43

    So sorry Maggie
    Praying for Harry
    Love Eddie x

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  5. Gosia2 May 2014 at 20:50

    I am very sorry because of your husband. Honestly I understand you but You have to be strong. I pray for you and your husband. Take care.

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  6. Formerly known as Frau2 May 2014 at 21:19

    I'm so sorry Harry is in so much pain....and as a care giver your sleep and health is so important! Take care

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  7. cheshire wife2 May 2014 at 21:41

    This is tough. Can you try ear plugs or sleeping in another room? At a time like this you really need your sleep. Also can the pain killers be changed or the dose increased?

    I hope that a solution can be found.
    CWx

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  8. Secret Agent Woman3 May 2014 at 02:38

    I am so, so sorry. Holding you both in my heart.

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  9. Hilary3 May 2014 at 03:48

    I'm so sorry that Harry is hurting so much. Perhaps it's time for docs to up his meds.. or dose a bit. And Celia's suggestion is a good one. Try getting your rest in another room during snore time, if you can.

    Sending hugs and love your way.

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  10. Rose3 May 2014 at 12:53

    I am so sorry that Harry is in so much pain. I know it must be hard for you, too, to watch him go through this. You need to take care of yourself, too, Maggie, though I know that's easier said than done. Keeping both of you in my thoughts and prayers.

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  11. dianefaith3 May 2014 at 13:41

    I'm sorry, Maggie. And I'm hoping that you're finding some moments of peace and relaxation.

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  12. Jeni3 May 2014 at 18:57

    I've been really bad for a long, long time now in trying to keep up a little bit, at least, with some of my favorite bloggers. Ever since they did away with the Reader, my blog reading really went to pot. But look what I discovered today when I decided I'd frittered away too much time between posting -but a thing very akin to having a reader again and voila, there was your blog and a new post too, Maggie! I am so sorry to hear of all the pain poor Harry is having to endure now and also, the way it affects you too. Not getting enough rest can really wear a person down very quickly too. Wish there were something he could take that would better handle the pain levels though. I know all too well certain things that will disrupt my equilibrium and bring on an intestinal cramping episod -somedays, it's fairly quick and not too harsh and then other days, it feels like it is never going to pass over and those days really disrupt my overall abilities to do anything other than sit -or lie down -and try to rest till it goes away, finally. The things we learn to endure as we get older, huh? Take care, stay safe and do try to get a bit more rest for yourself whenever you can! Peace.

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  13. Wisewebwoman4 May 2014 at 00:30

    Oh Maggie I am so very sorry to read this. How very tough for both of you.

    I hope you remain strong and perhaps you need another sleeping arrangement for you to catch your own healthful sleep?

    Know you are in my thoughts.

    XO
    WWW

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  14. Cathy5 May 2014 at 10:37

    Maggie, I have to agree with others in that you need as much rest as possible - how else are you going to be able to give Harry the time, help and devotion he needs. Then again you also deserve it as well - so maybe.if you picked up a urinal bottle for him from the disability shop he could use that in the bedroom (if that's all he needs) and it would cut down a little of the night disturbances.
    Having his pain relief reassessed would also be a good idea.
    I have a lot of admiration for those who care for their lifelong partners - is there a car for the carer group nearby where you can share some of you worries with others in similar circumstances - because you need some love and attention as well
    Take care
    Cathy.

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  15. Working Mum8 May 2014 at 15:22

    I can't imagine what that's like - I have tendonitis in my shoulder which wakes me up at night feeling sick with pain, but this sounds so much worse. I hope it gets better for him, and you, soon.

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  16. Suldog9 May 2014 at 12:33

    Prayers said, for the both of you. Hang in.

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  17. Anonymous9 May 2014 at 13:08

    Just checking in Maggie and I'm sorry to read this. I'm wishing you both well and hope to read more positive news soon.

    CJ x

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  18. Suburbia12 May 2014 at 22:47

    So sorry for you both Maggie, you are often in my thoughts

    Keep blogging, don't want to lose touch and always interested in how you all are

    Sx

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  19. Sally Wessely13 May 2014 at 04:04

    I'm so sorry to read of Harry's severe pain. I can only imagine how hard it is on both of you. I wish you could have a bit of relief. You sound tired. I'm sure you are exhausted. I pray you will have someone come in and give you a bit of a respite. God bless you, Maggie. You've had more than your share of tough times.

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  20. Akelamalu19 May 2014 at 19:34

    Aw I'm so sorry to hear this Maggie, I hope things improve for Harry and you. xx

    Sorry I've not been around much, we've been on holiday. xx

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