Sunday, 27 January 2013


Identical twins are aware of each other even before they are born. Their arms and legs touch constantly and they are from the same egg that has split in half, sharing the same placenta, so its not surprising that they are usually close to each other once they are born.

Harry and Larry were no exception, shared the same classes at school, wore identical clothes, knew the same friends and chose the same sort of occupation and interests.
Eventually, though, they each grew up with different close friends and worked on different building sites, chose different types of partners marrying within three months of each other. They have always remained very close. They tended to look less alike as they matured, except for mannerisms and speech. They love to argue with each other and things can get quite heated as each one tries to out do and out voice the other. I am assured that it is only friendly debating.
They have always phoned at least twice a day, even three or four times and see each other several times a week.
It always amazes me what they find to talk about.

They both share the same kind of cancer, though Harry's is much more advanced.
Last week we had a scare. Larry collapsed during the early hours of the night and was rushed to hospital. He is still there and it seems that he has a narrowed artery that will probably need major surgery for a repair to his heart. He is still undergoing lots of tests and is all wired up so cannot get out of bed except to use the toilet when he has to unplug himself from the monitor and take the wiring with him.

Harry is quite upset by this separation as he doesn't feel well enough to visit the hospital because he is undergoing chemotherapy. In fact, it might not be all that wise for him to go into a hospital with a compromised immune system in case he picks up a virus that could cause him grief.
They are phoning each other up regularly and Rhoda, my sister in law and I are in close contact with each other concerning everyones' health and well being. Rhoda is having a very difficult time right now and hasn't been coping too well but I'm sure once she settles from the shock of finding him  unconscious on the bathroom floor, that she'll become more used to things and will cope well. It is amazing how you are given the strength that you need to overcome a difficult situation...... strength that you didn't think you had.

As they are both so close, I can't help wondering if Harry will get the same problem with his heart? They are genetically very similar but obviously must have different fingerprints etc. One of them is a bit smaller than the other and Harry is the oldest by half an hour.
One day, one of them will have to face life alone when the other one dies. I'm sure that will be terrible for whoever it is, but common sense tells me that it would be a very rare thing for them to depart together at the same time. It must be a heartbreaking inevitability that twins will face trauma of this kind at some point.
I'm hoping that both will survive a long time yet, but one has to wonder....... 
At least I do.


FeltByRae said...

Maggie, my very best get well wishes to Larry and my thoughts are with you and especially Harry xxx

christopher said...

Difficult times indeed.

I hope their treatments go well and that they can enjoy a future with brighter days together once again.

Irene said...

My ex-husband is one of an identical twin also and I wonder about the same things. When you described your twin it reminded me of my twin. They are both still healthy but some of their older brothers and sisters have passed away and that has been hard on them. I wish your twin all the best. xox

Dimple said...

Good day, Maggie! (It is morning here, so I know it is afternoon where you are...)

I hope you, Rhoda, and your twins are blessed today with every spiritual blessing in Christ Jesus.

Love to you,

Secret Agent Woman said...

Oh boy, that's so hard. I hope they both respond wellt their treatments and have many more good times together.

When I was almost 14, my mother had identical twin boys. They did the usual twin things - had words of their own, helped each other get into all sorts of trouble, and so on. Such an amazing bond. One of my brothers drowned about 12 years ago, when he was 23, while they were on a camping trip. His surviving twin has never been the same. He still talks about him in the present tense, ("Ben likes that song.") It breaks my heart for him.

Expat mum said...

Oh dear. I'm so sorry for all that you and your family are having to deal with. Can't imagine facing the loss of a twin.

Jackie said...

Maggie....I never knew that Harry had a twin..much less an identical twin. How very wonderful that must be! To share such a close and wonderful bond.
As Larry is in the hospital and Harry is unable to visit, I pray for peace for both of them...and for a complete healing for Larry and for Harry. I do pray for God to take care of both of these brothers.
Thank you for sharing the information about Larry...and Harry.
Much love to you, dear Maggie.
Love you,

Leave It To Davis said...

Hugs and prayers for you all. My hubby's doctor seems to think (after practicing medicine for 40 years) that genes play the upper hand in how long we will live, unless we live dangerously. If I were you, I would ask Harry's doctor to check him out once he has overcome his cancer.

Coey said...

How are you doing lady? I can only imagine what it is like to watch both of them go through this. I hope you are well.

dianefaith said...

My father was an identical twin, too. He and his brother were so much alike that I even found myself confused one time, when I was about 15, when Wendom showed up in a place where my father was more likely to be. Although they looked so much alike, Wendom had a fun-loving bent that my father didn't have. Wendom died when he was 59. My father lived on to 77. Dad seemed to cope well, but he was always so quiet. I often wondered how much he was hiding, how deeply he was hurt.
I hope Larry is doing better and that both brothers have many more conversations ahead of them.

Akelamalu said...

My daughter-in-law is an identical twin so I know how close they can be. I wish Larry and Harry well and hope the treatment they are both receiving is successful. x

VioletSky said...

I had no idea Harry had a twin. And how distressing that they are both going through this same type if cancer. Your family has endured so much, my thoughts go out to you all.

Mimi said...

Maggie, my heart goes out to you all, you're dealing with so much difficult stuff here.
I hope that both Harry and Larry get the better of this cancer, and live long and happy days to enjoy each other and bask in the warmth of their mutual love. And I hope that you also bask in the radiance of that love.

Anonymous said...

Quite difficult to cope with this I suspect, Maggie, and your posts always leave me saying a little prayer that things will get easier.

CJ x

Beryl Ament said...

I hate it when external factors, e.g.illness, medical treatment, even family pressure, prevent a person from expressing his own care and concern. Harry must feel dreadful that his care for his brother has no outlet.

Eddie Bluelights said...

Will speak more on phone this weekend but sorry Larry is still having problems with his circulation/heart. Yes it is so sad when two lively and fun loving boys, then men gradually fall ill are are struck down by cancer and ailments. Life is so hard sometimes ~ Love Eddie

Hilary said...

Maggie, I didn't realize that Harry had a twin. Their respective illnesses and separation must be exceedingly difficult for both of them and for you and your sister in law. I too wish them many years of their close connection to come.