Photos copyright: Maggie May
This Christmas will be really different for me. You see, I will be having my first treatment of chemotherapy on 22nd of December, which is only three days before Christmas Day.
I am glad to be finally starting the treatment. It seems that I have been waiting for ever for chemo. I'm not sure how long it actually is but I do know what has held up the true diagnosis and start of the treatment.
Right from the beginning, I was warned that I had secondary cancer and that it was difficult to find the source. Now I have a definite diagnosis that is called Occult Cancer or CUP ( cancer from unknown primary.) It is fairly rare not to know where the cancer has come from and only about 3-4% of all cancers belong to this group and to make matters worse, out of that small minority, I am in the 30% of the rarer still cancers.
So treating this cancer will be a bit hit and miss.
I told you before that I am awkward......... or shall we call it special!
Anyway, I have to trust God that the treatment will shrivel up my three tumours and give me a long remission.
I know that many people are believers and praying for me all over the world and others are sending me warm, positive thoughts, reiki and anything else that might benefit me. I am grateful to all who are doing this, I really am.
Last Sunday in Church, I suddenly experienced a tremendous peace that came over me and I know it is all about the power of prayer. I went forward for healing and felt very calm inside. I am lucky to have a really good church family as well as all you lovely people.
I also have neighbours, friends and workmates who are all sending me love, warmth and good wishes and I know that every one really cares what happens to me. So I feel very blessed by these people and I know that I will have to hang on to all this when the going gets tough over the next few months.
I finished work last Friday, until further notice and felt really tearful and emotional about that. However it means that I have a week to catch up with my Christmas preparations that have been sadly neglected.
I have had to have a swine flu injection before I could have the chemo. This has made me feel quite ill, but I am over the worst of that now.
I am also going for a fitting for a wig soon (which I might never wear) and have also ordered some suitable headwear (in case I don't like the wig) from a firm on the internet that specialises in chemotherapy patients' head gear.
So I am all set for whatever the treatment throws at me. Let it come.